Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Grind My Teeth

Everybody has their pet peeves, but sometimes it's hard to understand why they're so irritating to us. And sometimes these mysterious pet peeves are so severe that they make us grind our teeth, stamp our feet, and punch walls while onlookers make a wide berth.
One day my loverly wife and I were riding in the car. Naturally I was singing all the hits of George Gershwin and Lara cranked the radio up to drown me out. That is, until a radio commercial for Schwarzchild Jeweler's came on. "...Dining al fresco!....Strappy SANDALS!" the lady intoned. "GAAAAH! I HATE this commercial!" Lara hollered. She then reached over and flicked the radio off and we drove on in silence until  I remembered the words to "It T'ain't Necessarily So."
On the ride back I switched over to Cole Porter and was singing "You're the Top" in my best Louis Armstrong voice and another Schwarzchild Jeweler's commercial came on, but this time a man was extolling the virtues of eating by "the rolling waves of the mighty James river!" Lara's reaction was the exact same, so I crooned "From this Moment On" to get her mind off the commercial. When we got home I just had to ask her why she hated those commercials.
"They're so STUPID and irritating! They come on all the time!"
Naturally, my response was to help her and the way I best determined was to desensitize her to these commercials. When I would pass by her, I would intone in a chipper, falsetto voice "STRAPPY SANDALS!" and in a baritone "the JAMES RIVER!"
She was not amused and sleeping arrangements were made for me on the couch. I decided to abandon the desensitizing therapy and just let the commercials run their course.
A few weeks went by and one commercial kept coming on over the radio that stuck in my craw.
"It means more, when it comes from Cowardin's," the singer crooned. And then a voice came on describing the story of how the jeweler's was founded, "The year was 1865 and Richmond was still burning..."
 It was jarring. Irritating. And most of all, I felt like driving my car into the mighty James river whenever it came on.
So far neither of us has found that panacea to cure us of these irrational pet peeves. Until then, we'll just have to continue singing, grinding our teeth, and gripping the steering wheel whenever we hear "STRAPPY SANDALS!" and "CO-WARDIN'S!"

A few thoughts

I need to write about the wedding and honeymoon. I will, I promise.

I had a few thoughts today while at the gym and at work. Most of them were about my husband and about being married.

Several people have asked me if I feel different. It's weird, because I DO feel different. Even though Trey and I have been together for several years and lived together for a bit, being married feels much more different than dating or even being engaged.

An engagement, while it would be painful, could be broken easily.  One hasn't signed any contracts or stood in front of their family and friends (and sometimes a judge) and proclaimed their love for someone else and promised to take care of them and be truthful to them for the remainder of their lives.

This may not appear to be a big thing, but when you stand up, in front of everyone, with your future spouse and tell him (or her) that you will love them, care for them, support them and stand by them, and when you exchange rings and say "I do" all of a sudden, the relationship changes. You are legally and spiritually bound to another person for the rest of your life.  It is a powerful feeling. It's a feeling I don't think you can experience until you're married to someone.

The day after we got married I told Trey that I was so happy that we were still acting like ourselves; that I was glad that nothing about us as individuals had changed. We are still Trey and Lara. Our personalities are still the same, we still disagree on what to watch on TV, and we still have weird nicknames for each other (and our dog). But the WE of us is what's different.

Anyway, I think that made more sense in my head than it might here.

Switching topics a little I wanted to talk about one of the reasons that I love Trey so much: he has always treated my brother with respect, compassion and love. Trey doesn't let John get away with anything or blow off something that John says or does. If John does or says something that is inappropriate, Trey will discuss with John why what he did or said is inappropriate. He doesn't give him a "bye" because he has a disability. And the awesome thing is, is that he does this with EVERYONE.

I have introduced Trey to several people who have physical and/or intellectual disabilities. He has never once (at least to my knowledge) felt awkward or uncomfortable.  A lot of times people (and sometimes friends) will refer to people with Down syndrome or other intellectual disabilities as 'they' separating people with disabilities from the general population. Trey does not do this. And you know else I love? I never EVER had to "educate" him on the PC terms, lingo, phrases, etc for being a part of my world.

It's almost as if we were supposed to be together :)

Sunday, October 21, 2012


A very big part of our life is our baby puppy, Harley. Now, Harley is not, in fact, a baby puppy. She just turned 4 years old this past August, leaving puppy-dom. However, she is the sweetest, happiest girl I have ever known.

Harley came to us in a roundabout way. While I was in grad school she wandered up to a friend's house. He let her in, wanting to give her some food and water, and she hopped up on the couch like she owned the house. Incidentally, I wasn't going to take her at first. I was living in a place that didn't allow dogs, but I decided around the end of the year to move out. The place I moved to allowed dogs, but I couldn't take Harley home for the holidays. A friend took care of her for me until we came back for spring semester. 

She was a really scared puppy for awhile. She hated cars and didn't like some people for the longest time. Whenever I would walk her I would have to carry her around the cars parked on the side of the road. Eventually, I would put her in the car once a day and we would either drive around aimlessly or go to the doggie park or go to a friend's house. After a week of this she grew to love the car and now when she hears the word 'car' she runs to the door and barks at us as if to say "Come on! Hurry up!" 

Harley loves cuddling with us. All we have to do is let her up on the couch or on the bed with us and she snuggles up to one of us (she loves laying on my stomach and on Trey's lap) and in a few minutes she's fast asleep. 

While we were gone in Savannah we kept talking about how much she would love walking around the squares and sitting with us as we ate outdoors at restaurants. We really missed her!

Here's a good picture of Harley last winter at our house in Norfolk, Va. Incidentally, as I'm writing this, she is wearing the same sweater!

Saturday, October 20, 2012


So, since we got married we decided to start a blog about us, what we do, and about our travels!

We have a lot to write about our wedding and our honeymoon. We had an absolutely beautiful and fun wedding and a very fun honeymoon in Savannah! We returned home, today, to a beautiful fall in Richmond after being very warm in Savannah. We ate a lot of good Southern food and saw a lot of Savannah-such a beautiful city!

I think this first post will be an introduction of sorts.

I (Lara) currently work at the Office of the Chief Medical Examiner in Richmond, Virginia as a Medicolegal Death Investigator. I really love my job and think it's the most interesting field out there. I am an avid reader of various genres of literature to include classics, supernatural/paranormal fiction, and chick lit :) I love going to wineries and tasting different wines produced in Virginia-the Virginia wine industry is expanding so rapidly! It's exiting to be able to experience it.  I also love travelling, whether it's to the beach, on a cruise, or a hop across the pond.

I (Trey) stick it to the man on a daily basis. My hobbies are woodworking, woodcarving, playing guitar, drinking Chinese pu'er tea. I am currently attempting to figure out what it is I do best, whether I can do it in public or not, and if I could possibly do it for a living. Like Lara, I enjoy Virginia wines and hope that Meritage blends get the recognition they deserve.

So, that's us, in a nutshell. Hopefully, as we continue to develop this blog our family and friends can get to know us better!